Children Overcoming Tragedy

I was browsing through Psychology Today when I found an article called Five Ways Children Overcome Tragedy. As a child who did have to overcome such things, I found this interesting. I wanted to look and see if I used any of these skills. Turns out, I did and I'll tell you just how I applied them to my life.

1. Focus on positive reinforcements. Basically, this is just talking about the love that is needed from surrounding adults, especially parents. As there was no way I was going to get love from my biological parents, my new family showed me more than what I knew how to take. My biggest struggle with this was accepting all they had to offer. However, once I learned how to do that, it helped immensely.
2. Maintain regular structure and routines. This provides children with a baseline - something stable. It could be anything from eating together at the dinner table to reading a bedtime story to playing a game. Whatever you choose to do, it will help the child feel secure and realize their safety. I began composing my routine right away so that I'd have something familiar. School was probably my save haven.
3. Nurture positive choices and teach problem-solving. This helps children distinguish between good and bad choices. Although sometimes it is assumed that everyone knows good from bad, that's not necessarily true. When I was growing up, my normal was completely different from everyone else's normal. My new parents did a good job of teaching me right from wrong. Believe it or not, I am still learning every day. Often times, I do things that I don't even realize are out of line. That's why my parents are there - to tell me what I'm doing wrong so I can correct it.
4. Remember every day is a new day & a new opportunity. This is so important because we're all human and we are all going to make mistakes - especially when we are healing. I still make mistakes on a daily basis, and because of my extreme personality, I'm usually go big. Either way, I am constantly reminding myself that "Just for today.." I can change things. My day can change at any given time and tomorrow begins a clean slate.
5. Understand that severe or ongoing problems require professional help. It is common for children and adults to be left with serious issues that require serious help after tragedy. I have a number of these issues. I have two counselors that I meet with weekly and many different problems to work through. This doesn't mean I'm a bad person or that I'll never heal. If anything, it makes me strong for getting the help I need. Just remember that everything takes time.

Hope this helps with others. It sure did help me(:
info from psychologytoday.com; picture from gorgeoushealthyme.com

They Got Away With MURDER!?

Five reasons why people get away with murder!

1. They know how to fit into a crowd. It's important to know that dangerous people do not look any different than your mother, grandmother, or brother. These people are different in their heads, not physically.
2. They are persuasive. They would be able to sweet talk you into anything. Heck, I can't even get my best friend to go to Sheetz' to buy me a slushie!! These people are able to make you believe that they are not dangerous and do not pose a threat to anyone.
3. They are calm, cool, and collected. They don't crack under pressure. They can commit a murder and walk away without so much as a guilty conscious. They seem to think strategically with everything and they tend not to show much emotion.
4. Contrary to what people may believe, the televison is misleading. There usually isn't much evidence left behind, if any!
5. Witnesses are scared. They don't usually come forward. And even if, by chance, they do, sometimes the whole story doesn't come out because they are trying to protect someone.

Now you know. I could never be a criminal. I crack under pressure way too easily, and, like I said, I can't even get a slushie!! (:

This guys looks normal, eh? He's one of the most popular serial killers in the United States. Yep, that's Ted Bundy.





info from psychologytoday.com
picture from google images.

Triad of Evil

Can three simple behaviors in children tell if you are going to be prone to being a murderer? Some think YES! However, others believe that this is only a sterotype. The formula, consisting of the following predicts that you will have some issues others may not, but it does not neccessarily condemn you to killing:

animal cruelty + fire setting + bed wetting = murderer!??

However, all three of these behaviors show up often in most violent criminals but just because you have them doesn not mean you are going to be a killer. It is typical for serial killers to have all three of these behaviors continue past the age of five, according to a research study conducted by various criminologists.

info from psychologytoday.com